Klopfenpop posited the idea of whether or not a tree was a definable thing within science, poking holes in the categorization of species within the biological sciences. Steve knew nothing about this so basically just lists a bunch of things that definitely are not trees even though they're tall and some of the branch.
it's a really dumb song but Klopfenpop has a great verse on it!
lyrics
[Steve Verse 1]
Imma just take a little moment to explain
That a vertical structure and a tree ain’t the same
See it seems pretty evident but join my simple game
Tell me what could be a tree and Imma hit you with refrain
Telephone poles? Not even in the ballpark
They’re wood with branches but they lack perennial spark
Cell Phone Towers? Further off the mark
They metal, electronical, not of earth, let’s start
Again, nope, basketball players ain’t either
Yeah their arms could be braches but they not sunlight breathers
Skyscrapers are out, do you have a fever
They’re concrete and steel, not a plant, not a creature
Giraffes, you’re closer, they got them long necks
But the animal kingdom would likely take offense
At least they eat trees, or parts, in your defense
Shouldn’t have to explain it, fucking nonsense
[Chorus]
This concept isn’t hard just check the dictionary
And your lack of comprehension got me worried and warry
Are you like a Captcha? Having me click the image
I feel like a person should recognize the visage of a
Tree. It’s like, an everyday object
And if you can’t identify one, well, you’re a project
But to offset your lack of knowledge of here to assist
You’ve got to know what a tree is if you’re gonna exist
[Bridge]
What about ladders? Not a tree
Tall stack of crackers? Not a tree
Monoliths basalt? Not a tree
Poles to Pole Vault? Not a tree
[Steve Verse 2]
I feel like we spent a lot of time on this already
Now I want you focused, mind right, eyes steady
Just because it’s tall doesn’t equal a tree
So AMA, cause I got time, ask me anything
Air traffic towers? They spread at the top
But they lack any foliage, no go, full stop
And stone henge is just a big pile of rocks
None of these are close, so Imma tick em off
No to the eiffal tower, no to electric power
Structures that string lines like vines, no flowers
No to the fake plastic Christmas centerpiece now there
Could be an argument there, to the doubters
If sex doll ain’t a person than that don’t make the grade
No to the strength testing game at the circus arcade
No to the elevator shaft, listen, wait
You were ALMOST THERE WITH A FUCKING LEMONADE… Stand
[Chorus]
This concept isn’t hard just check the dictionary
And your lack of comprehension got me worried and warry
Are you like a Captcha? Having me click the image
I feel like a person should recognize the visage of a
Tree. It’s like, an everyday object
And if you can’t identify one, well, you’re a project
But to offset your lack of knowledge of here to assist
You’ve got to know what a tree is if you’re gonna exist
[Bridge]
NASA Space Shuttle? Not a Tree
Antenna on Hubble? Not a Tree
Single Skill Upgrades? Not a Tree
Vermont Upstate? Not a Tree
credits
from Working From Home,
released April 20, 2020
Beats/Production/Mixing/Mastering - Ultraklystron
Wooden Words Rapped Well - Steve & Klopfenpop
Steve is a Nerdcore artist working on new solo material. He will rap about feelings and fandoms on his new, upcoming album, Steve. For now, enjoy his former solo tracks from years ago until the new album comes out.
The Philadelphia rapper turns the children's music formula on its head with old-school beats and sharp life lessons. Bandcamp Album of the Day Sep 13, 2023